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UD alumni are victims of 'The Unspeakable'
11:15 a.m., March 22, 2007--“I learn of it on television. I've been sitting at the computer answering e-mail.... I stop for coffee and a bite to eat. I carry a mug and toast and switch on the set in the den.... There's been a shooting [the early morning news anchor] says, and she names the location.... Several people have been wounded, she continues. At least one confirmed dead. I know the location. I know the parking lot. I know that one dead is my husband, and I start to scream.” With these words Denise Buel Brown, AS '81, '87M, opens her memoir The Unspeakable, a tale of the complicated and almost inexpressible grief that unwittingly swallowed her family following a terrible act of violence. With an honesty that is almost painful at times, she chronicles her journey from pampered corporate wife to bewildered widow raising a son and twin daughters alone. Brown will be on campus to read from the book, recently published by the University of Delaware Press, at 4:30 p.m., Thursday, April 12. The event, free and open to the public, will be held in the Reserve Room of the Morris Library. To request an invitation, send an e-mail to [jhamm@udel.edu]. The book will be available at the event for purchase from the UD Bookstore. On March 6, 1998, a disgruntled employee went on a rampage at the Connecticut Lottery Corp., killing four executives, before turning the gun on himself. Brown's husband, Otho (Ott) Brown, 69 'BE, who was president and CEO of the quasi-public corporation, led the gunman into the parking lot, away from more than 100 other employees. The gunman proceeded to shoot Brown three times before killing himself. At Mr. Brown's funeral, former Connecticut Gov. John G. Rowland called him a “hero.” Before moving to Connecticut, Ott Brown was well-known in his native Delaware, where he enjoyed a career in public service. Beginning as a budget analyst in 1983, he moved up the ranks and served as then-Gov. Michael N. Castle's deputy chief of staff. Castle named Mr. Brown director of the Delaware State Lottery in 1987, and Mr. Brown kept that post until 1991. He was chosen to head the Connecticut Lottery in 1993. Details like these can be found in Pulitzer Prize-winning articles that ran in the Hartford Courant after the shootings. Brown's book is a touch vague on details and much more poetic in its recounting of the Browns' romance and life together. At the same time, it is excruciatingly honest, and there are times when Denise Brown allows her readers to not like her very much. We expect, for example, for the young widow to be grateful when the Connecticut Lottery sets up educational funds for her children. We wince a little bit when she decides the level of education it will provide is not enough and goes to bat for her children by asking for more. We read of her reliance on alcohol after the tragedy and easily pass judgment, self-righteously thinking we would never do the same.
In the foreword to the book, Brown writes that its purpose is to “contribute a counter-voice to the love song of violence we so willingly sing in our society. To illustrate the devastation of a family with a father suddenly gone. To offer comfort to those who have suffered as well, to show how we survived.” The book was culled from journals Brown kept in the aftermath of the tragedy. She said it began to take shape in 2000 with the publication in Northeast Magazine of what would become the bulk of the first chapter. The whole thing came together, she said, over five years, in fits and starts. Asked if writing the book gave her a sense of closure, Brown replied, “No, not closure. There's no such thing. In the aftermath of violence, you feel an overwhelming compulsion to right the wrong, to address what has occurred, or come to some inner or spiritual understanding. Many people become activists. That wasn't my path, though I do speak now and then. But, with the publication of the book, there is a sense of completion of a goal, of course, and of contribution. It's a beautiful world, but brutal as well, and we live in a 'Bring it on' society. The book is my way of saying, in part, 'Enough.'” Throughout the book, Brown, who was raised in Sussex County, makes references to her plans to pursue a doctorate in English at UD, a plan that was ultimately put on hold. Currently, resettled in Vermont, she teaches part-time at Lyndon State College and writes a food column that appears in two monthly Vermont newspapers. Last year, she co-edited a Civil War memoir for the local historical society. She has a novel and a cookbook in the works. “Vermont provided a safe haven, a fine place to raise the kids and regroup, if you will. The mountains and lakes, the night sky, even the months of snow are all good for the soul,” she said. Brown's children, who were 8 and 10 when their father was killed, are now young adults. Her son, 19, is studying computer programming at Pittsburgh Technical Institute. The twin girls will be 18 in March and are busy planning their futures. The Unspeakable is available at the UD Bookstore, where faculty, staff and students can get a 10 percent discount with their UD IDs. The book also is available from the UD Press for $29.95. For more information or to order a copy, visit [http://www2.lib.udel.edu/udpress/brown.htm]. Article by Beth Thomas
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