Becoming a better dad: UD resources can help

Matt Lenno, assistant director of UD’s Student Centers, takes a moment to learn about child development from Judith Herrman, an instructor in the School of Nursing. As a parent of a child enrolled in the Early Learning Center (ELC), Lenno is able to utilize the ELC’s “Ask a Nurse Program,” as well as other parenting resources.

4:42 p.m., June 10, 2005--Most careers require months, if not years, of education or training. Parenting is one of the few jobs that doesn’t come with any formal training. Yet, the work we do as parents is profoundly important.

Fathers (and mothers) typically learn what they need to know as they go along, through trial-and-error and advice from family and friends.

But, fathers also can find community support, including University of Delaware resources, to help them do their best at the difficult job of parenting.

Delaware Cooperative Extension provides research-based information to parents in workshops and classes offered in each county. UD Extension also makes parenting material available online at The Extension Cord [http://ag.udel.edu/extension/fam/], which is coordinated by family and human development specialist Pat Tanner Nelson.

The Extension Cord web site has a section for “parents, grandparents and mentors,” featuring information on adoption and foster care, communication skills, divorce, family finances, single parenting and family fun. There’s an area just for fathers, offering guidance on talking with kids about tough issues, advice for non-resident fathers, fathering daughters and support groups for fathers.

Because many parenting issues are age specific, Nelson has developed two targeted newsletters. Great Beginnings is tailored to parents of newborns to 3-year-olds; Families Matter! focuses on the needs of parents of school-aged children.

The newsletters are available in both print and online versions. In addition, the print Great Beginnings for parents of newborns to 12-month-olds is offered in Spanish. Eventually, Nelson says she would like to be able to offer all editions in Spanish.

Great Beginnings discusses specific month-to-month concerns that arise during the first three years of a child’s life. For example, parents of 1-month-olds learn how to develop bedtime routines and find out why babies spit up. The newsletter sent to parents of 19-month-olds addresses self-feeding, playing with others, security blankets and how to make inexpensive homemade toys.

The print version of Families Matter! also is distributed monthly but is more general in focus, covering such issues as self-esteem, family meetings, stress, parent-teacher conferences, raising a non-violent child and teen emotional development.

Online, Families Matter topics are grouped into categories by age, as well as an “all ages” section for such perennial concerns as setting limits, getting ready for back to school and teaching a child to do the right thing.

“I think fathers, in particular, appreciate our newsletters,” Nelson says. “Because of work demands or other constraints, fathers may not always be able to attend an Extension workshop that interests them. So, they turn to the newsletters to acquire the information they need.”

The university’s Early Learning Center (ELC) is a parenting resource for the 200-plus families who send their children there. The ELC serves children from all areas of the community. This includes a strong commitment to children from economically, racially and ethnically diverse backgrounds, as well as children with special needs.

Throughout the year, the ELC offers a series of parenting workshops. Past topics have included encouraging early literacy, balancing the family budget and making quick and healthy snacks.

The “Ask a Nurse Program” at the ELC is another source of help. Parents can obtain health information from nursing department staff or students and are able to receive parenting magazines, brochures and newsletters.

Center director Karen Rucker says long-range goals include offering GED and English as a second language classes. She advises parents to turn to their children’s own schools, child care providers and camps for parenting programs and materials. PTO and PTA meetings often present speakers who are experts in education, child development, psychology or another relevant area.

It’s hard to be a good father. Dads who seek out advice and support make their jobs easier—and do them better, as well.

Article by Margo McDonough
Photo by Kathy F. Atkinson

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