11:42 a.m., Oct. 8, 2009----University of Delaware alumnus John Anderson, a 1981 graduate of the College of Arts and Sciences, and his wife Sharon were on NBC's Today show on Thursday, Oct. 8, to discuss his new book, Stand By Her: A Breast Cancer Guide for Men.

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The focus of the book is how men can deal with breast cancer when it is strikes the significant women in their lives. Stand By Her is a personal account and also a how to book on what to expect, how to help, how to negotiate the mine fields of breast cancer from diagnosis to recovery in what Anderson refers to as “Cancer Land.”

As he pointed out, when his wife Sharon was diagnosed with breast cancer, there was nothing but a stack of meaningless papers to help him help her.

Anderson has had more experience with breast cancer than most -- his mother died of breast cancer and his wife, sister and a close family friend were diagnosed and treated for breast cancer.

As a result, he can speak as a husband, son, brother and friend and what roles each, including fathers, can play in helping the women in their lives. The book is for everyone, including doctors and patients, touched by breast cancer, he said.

On Thursday's program, Anderson discussed the “follow -- don't lead” concept. Men tend to want to take charge, he said, but this is a time she is the leader and needs support by holding her, touching her and following her wishes. She is the commander-in-chief, heading a corps of family, friends and supporters.

Sharon spoke of when, after her operation, she showed John her scar and her husband said, “You are more beautiful to me now than ever before.” It was a strong point of their marriage, she said.

Anderson said he was not always perfect in his support. “There are times you have to take a cancer leave,” he said, “and step back and recharge.” In the book, he advises marriage counseling for couples that have been through breast cancer, writing it is good to get a “tune-up” and “unclog any channels of communication before problems arise.”

He concludes, “If ever there is a time for a renewal between a husband and wife, it is after breast cancer,” writing, “Now that her cancer is no more, get out into that great big world and live life to its fullest.”

Anderson is president and founder of The Farm, an advertising and production company in Virginia and New York, and is a writer and also an attorney specializing in entertainment and business law. He also has written, directed and produced television shows, including commercials for Lifetime Television's Stop Cancer for Life campaign.

Article by Sue Moncure