It takes real American dollars to do all of the good work at Jim's Simply Marvelous Center. Those splendid workshops don't drop out of the sky, no matter what some happy face administrators say in public. Really really neat activities cost really really big bucks. Now we, the non volunteers of the Simply Marvelous Center, do not accept government tax dollars. "Phooey," Jim Himself says, about government grants. "Double and triple phooey!" We do, at the JSMCFPI, accept donations from private individuals and free market corporations. But remember, none of that Washington kickback, slush-fund payola. Jim again: "No taxation without amortization!" Is the man wise or what? Returning to the fiscal question at hand, however: our development committee suggests that you stand up like real home sapiens and get with some New Age creative charitable giving. How about tithing? A cool 10% comes right off the top of your paycheck each pay period. We can arrange to have it electronically transferred to Jim's personal checking account. No muss, no fuss, no middle men (or women or persons or sentient creatures or nonsignificant fiducial others). Direct to Jim Himself. And, we should note: this is NOT a tax deductible contribution for you. That's right! We at JSMCFPI want you to be real pedagogues--no more whining, no more yellow-belly money grubbing and double dealing for the crumbs of tax deductions!. Grow up! Give up! Cough up the cash like a car-driving, lawn-mowing citizen of the world! Hah! Double hah! Be altruistic until the beta blockers wear off. Benefit yourself by benefiting us--see the logic in this: give to us to give to yourself. Follow the thought, read this paragraph over and over. Live it, breathe it, put it in your will. Give everything to us. We are your true family of the cosmos. Who are those creatures you call your children, your relatives? What in the world do they do for your teaching evaluations anyway? Diddly squat, right? Who cares? Jimbo cares! Do you want him to stop caring, huh? To leave you alone in your basement, trembling in some corner by the sump pump, wondering if your existence has been totally gratuitous, your incompetence plain for all to see, your fumbling exposed to young and old alike? Only James the Simply Marvelous can bring you pedagogical peace--and something like that is priceless. Now, take out that checkbook. I said take it out, now, and start paying your fair share--heck, more than your fair share. You never know when the trembling will start again, do you? It could be any minute now. Any minute--just think about that and add some zeros to the check, lots of them. They take the trembling away, far away. Wave goodbye to the trembling zero by zero. Bye! Bye bye! Hello Jimbo! Here comes the sun, here comes Jimbo! Terra firma! Terra incognita! Terra dactyl!