Expert urges students to think safety, party wisely
Brett Sokolow: “Watch out for each other, both men and women. Don’t leave your friends behind at the party.”
4:59 p.m., Oct. 12, 2007--An expert in high-risk student health and safety issues advised a crowd of 250 gathered in Clayton Hall on Oct. 8, to look out for each other's safety at parties and consider the possible consequences of their actions. In a sobering and humorous presentation, “Drunk Sex or Date Rape: Can You Tell the Difference?” Brett Sokolow, an attorney, used the example of a real court case involving two college students whose lives were drastically altered after they met at a party.

The students in the case, dubbed Todd and Amy to conceal their identities, met at a house party in a college town. Amy had drunk several beers when Todd joined her and offered her several Jello shots made with very strong grain alcohol. Later that night, Amy got sick and heavily intoxicated and Todd, who did not drink much alcohol, took her to her room where the two eventually had sexual intercourse that Amy could not recall later that morning.

In his engaging presentation, Sokolow walked the audience through the key steps that led to the incident, including details of how incapacitated Amy had become and the fact that Todd, who worked as a bartender, not only knew that the grain alcohol was illegal, but he and four other male students had made the shots for the party.

Slightly more than half the audience voted by a show of hands to convict Todd of rape, a trend that Sokolow said he had seen when he presented the same case to many students across the country, reinforcing the fact that both Todd and Amy did not make very good decisions that night.

Todd was convicted of sexual assault in the second degree and served 18 months in prison before he was freed and registered as a sex offender. He eventually enrolled in a community college, one of the few that would have accepted him, and then had difficulty finding a job before he was hired for a highway winter maintenance facility.

Distracted by the trial, Amy's grades went on a downward spiral and she eventually dropped out of college after trying to kill herself. She was awarded more than $1 million in a subsequent civil lawsuit, but never cashed the check, Sokolow said.

“It didn't mean anything to her,” Sokolow said. “I realized that after the fact that there is no amount of money that can put such people together. It was rough to watch them go through that and my fervent hope for you is that you take it to heart, and I hope you'll never have to deal with this.

“Amy was not looking out for her friends and her friends were not looking out for her, and I hope you are going to do that differently,” Sokolow said. “Watch out for each other, both men and women. Don't leave your friends behind at the party. It's like having a designated driver to make sure everybody gets home, and if you are going to do that, do it intelligently: Don't look for the person who is least drunk, designate the person before the party starts.”

Kate Lazarus, a sophomore fashion merchandising major and leadership minor from Commack, N.Y., said the talk was an eye-opener that she would share with her friends.

“It's something to really think about before they do some things when they are drunk knowing that it can affect your whole life,” Lazarus said. “You don't think that one decision like that can change your whole life.”

Andrew Battle, a senior hotel restaurant and institutional management major from Wenonah, N.J., said Sokolow's talk was effective because it combined humor with the message, which drove home the point that students should think about their future when they are making decisions.

Dave Tully, president of the Greek Council, said the event was the education component of the council's education series, which also includes university relations and service.

“We believe that it is important to constantly educate the student body outside the classroom,” Tully said. “Bringing Brett to campus just before Homecoming brings awareness before going into a weekend where there is a lot of partying. Obviously, we want people to think about these issues going ahead, but we felt that Homecoming was a good time to bring it up.”

Sokolow is legal counsel to nine colleges and is the president of the National Center for Higher Education Risk Management. He has made presentations at more than 1,400 campuses and has authored two books and articles on campus safety and sexual assault.

The event was sponsored by UD's Greek Council, Student Centers Programming Advisory Board, Interfraternity Council, Panhellenic Council and the National Pan-Hellenic Council.

Article by Martin Mbugua
Photos by Duane Perry